nikole's purple world!

its been a long since i created my last blog... sorry for not keeping my promise to update this one...

its 11:03 am here in the office... waiting for calls to come in... i have been 8 minutes idle and still countin... he he he...

gee... ive got nothin to say ... honestly, i cant think of any.... just wanna tell everyone an advance happy holidays.... mwaaaah

Carrie: Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous
                                                     *****

Carrie: I'm looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love. And I don't think that love is here in this expensive suite in this lovely hotel in Paris.
                                                     *****

Charlotte (to Samantha): Is your vagina in the New York City guidebooks? Because it should be - it's the hottest spot in town - it's always open.

                                                     *****

Carrie: No matter who broke your heart, or how long it takes to heal, you'll never get through it without your friends.
                                                     *****

Samantha: Let's get something straight. I want no part of that. That turns everything into a big screaming mess. We are work and sex, nothing more. Now, kindly take off those pants and show me your dick.
                                                     *****

Carrie: You have to figure ... if the world's fattest twins can find love, there's hope for all of us. Somewhere out there is another little freak who will love us, understand us, and kiss our 3 heads and make it all better.

                                                     *****

Carrie: One woman's pornographer is another woman's spiritual leader.

                                                    *****

Charlotte: I mean, don't you ever really wanna' be pounded hard, you know, like when the bed is moving all around and it's all sweaty and your head is knocking up against the headboard and you feel like it might just blow off. Dammit', I just really wanna' be fucked, you know just really fucked!

                                                   *****

Miranda: I'm telling you: the fat ass, the farting - it's ridiculous. I am un-fuckable. And I have never been so horny in my entire life. ... That's why you're supposed to be married when you're pregnant, as somebody is obligated to have sex with you.

                                                  *****

just done watching 'SEX and THE CITY' season 4 and before i knew it, i just cant wait to see the season 5 and 6... yeah i know...i think, i'm the only 21 year old woman exposed to sex who haven't appreciate sex and the city...but hey... i changed...in fact...im crazy about it...and have been planning where to buy the season 5 and 6 discs...

favorite episode from season 4? i think its episode 2 'The Real Me'..

favorite part of that episode? that's when Carrie fell down on the catwalk and stood up and smile and shows her confidence to her audience...the background music is fuckin cool...i love it... and also...the Dolce and Gabbana underwear...perfecto!

favorite character? SAMANTHA - she's a biatch!

unforgettable line?

Samantha (answering the phone): Well, it's about fucking time! Come over here and do me!
Carrie: Is that your standard greeting now?

so now...i would probably research where i could buy the season 5 and 6...just hope its cheap..

dont worry...i wont buy pirated vcd's...oh cmon...

its 12:46pm and am still thinkin what to write in here...i've been thinkin how to start my blog for this day...actually, ive already did...

last friday, my aunt and i got the news that our visa were approved..so its cool..

but today...it's NOT! why?

my aunt and i went to makati just this morning to inquire for the travel and health insurance for my schengen visa and fu**, it is so expensive...

in other words, we decided not to get it yet plus the fact that we are required to present our airline ticket and of course we dont have our freakin tickets yet..so we went to the sweden embassy just a couple of floors away from the insurance company, to inquire when will gonna be the effectivity of our visa starts and lo and behold, we found out that it's only my visa that was approved...not my aunt...and its ridiculous because last friday, they just confirmed it to me that both of our visa were approved..sucks isnt? so here i am...i need to wait for my aunt visa's decision...wait within this week....AGAIN...

another crappy week...

UNRELIABLE INDEED!

i just hope that it's a good a result...

its my  2nd day of being a bum...i just recently filed my resignation letter ...that was last thursday (march 3, 05)...its kinda sad though....but life has to move on... i know that i did the right thing...its just that i dont find myself happy doing those things and knowing me.... i always go with things that will make me shout 'OH YEAH, im lovin it'...you know what i mean....i just missed the feelin of excitement goin to work everyday...which not makes me feel stressed...its like you are workin but you dont feel that you are working...i missed that coz im just too burned out these last few months... and thought needed some space...i need to rest...feels like i will gonna burst if i'll be staying for another week or so in my workstation... so i fin'lly decided to go on my own way...

its really a relief...finally...i could go out now with my long lost friends...i've been wanting to spend time with them but i was not able to do it because i need to work...work...and work...and it sucks...

but of course my stay with MSN is really a blast....i love the generosity of my team manager in terms of encouragement and outlook in life... i owe my maturity from him...thanks HERMAN DY...and also from my teammates... for all the experiences....from the first day that we go live up to my last day...you guys showed me that i truly belong...you guys really rock!  for me... you're the best teammates....if you weren't my teammates...i would probably be the loneliest msn technical support engineer in the planet....OMG.. do i sound so exaggerated? eheheh...well i just want you to feel that it's been a joyride being with you guys...thanks for all the memories....for the nastiest jokes we shared and for all the get -together-thang...i'll be missin that...

anyhow, i would still be here for you guys...just one text away like what i said...

for the meantime...im starting to enjoy now the new phase  of my life...

me and my so-close-to-be-my-bestfriend went out last night....we had a blast ...because we cant stop our freakin mouth...we kept on reminiscin our college years...i guess that's normal...hehehe....and it makes me feel good...it restores everythin and i love it...

so here i am in the front of computer...makin some blogs....i have 3 blogsites already and i promise to update all of them everyday...i hope i'll not be THAT busy...

anyway, feels like i need to end this one...j

will post again later....

holla....

It's over. He's gone.

Why do we have to part while
the love is still there?
Why do we have to suffer?
Why do we have to cry when
somebody bids goodbye?
Why do beginnings have an end?
Why do we have to meet
only to lose in the end?

There are questions left unanswered,
words left unsaid, letters left unread,
poems left undone, songs left unsung,
love left unexpressed,
promises left unfulfilled.

In a relationship,
one of the hardest things to do
is saying goodbye and letting go.
It is as hard as breaking a crystal
because you'll never know when you
will be able to pick up the pieces again.
More often than not, they who go,
feel not the pain of parting:
it is they who stay behind that suffer,
because they are left
with memories of a love
that was meant to be,
a love that was.

At the beginning and at the end
of a relationship,
we are embarrassed to find ourselves alone.
Unfair as it may seem,
but that's the way love goes.
That's the drama, the bittersweet
and the risk of falling in love.
After all, nothing is constant but change.
Everything will eventually come to its end
without us knowing when,
without us knowing how,
without us even knowing why.
And we must forget not because we have to
but because we have to.

In letting go, sorrows come
not as a single spy but in batallion.
It seems that everywhere you go,
everything you do,
every song you hear,
every turn of your head,
every move of your body,
every beat of your heart,
every blink of your eye and every breath
you take always reminds you of him.
It's like a stab of a knife,
a torture in the night.
Funny how the whole world
becomes depopulated
when only one person is missing.
Just imagine,
there are billion people on earth
and yet it seems you feel lonely
and empty without the other.

I don't know if it's worth calling an art,
but letting go entails
special skills sparkled
with a considerable space and time.
Time heals all wounds but it takes
a little push on our part.
Acceptance plays a part.
Not all love stories end with
"...and they live happily ever after."

Sometimes we have to part because of
circumstances beyond our control.
We have to suffer if it would
mean happiness for others.
We have to cry to
temporarily let go of the pains.
Every beginning has its end
like every dawn has its dusk.
It's something we can't control,
something we had to live up.

It's over.
He's gone. But life has to go on.
Goodbye doesn't always mean forever.
There will always be a place and time
where questions will be answered,
words will be spoken,
letters will be read,
poems will be recited in the night,
songs will be sung in harmony,
love will be expressed in solitude and
promises will be fulfilled.
Somewhere. Somehow. Someday.


sigh...

sad but true ....

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
nikole . nekie . nix

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
purple_addict . nekieyow . AsHLyJuDD

THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
sexual mentality . bawdy . paranoia

THREE THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
nose . weight . bellies

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
chinese . filipino . yun lang

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
ghosts . huge mice . death

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
wallet . bag . fone

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
my violet shawl . pinstripe slacks . long sleeves fitted shirt

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS: 
true faith . earth, wind and fire . eraserheads

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS: 
the closer i get to you by roberta flack . different seasons by johnny hates jazz . without you by charlie wilson

THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
travel . establish a business . work abroad

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
i love violet . im an asshole as per the requirement . that am still a virgin??? hehehe

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX (or same) THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
eyes . sex appeal . attitude

THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
stare a dead animal especially a RAT <yuck!!> . go on a diet <damn...>. wear those freakin thongs / t-back

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
go to PARIS . resign . get out from my work station and go home

There is a face deep in your mind
One that your heart won’t leave behind
Memories are cold-empty of laughs
And all that remains are photographs

(chorus)

When she’s gone there are no reasons
Nature’s cruel - it’s just different seasons
Going on and on

There is a voice deep in your soul
Telling your not to lose control
And day after day you hold back the tears
’cos pain is the greatest of your fears

(chorus)

There are no reasons
Say it’s only different seasons       

after eleven days, am fin'lly back to my senses doing blogs again.. apologize for being sluggard these past few days...hehehe... it's kinda odd though, we don't have a lot of calls for the past 5 days or so but i dont have that drive to make this blog thingy...i guess thats mood swing...well it really counts.. hehehe...

anyway, i'm back...ehehhe...to rule the msn spaces again...MABUHAY ANG MGA BLOGGER!

5 1/2 more hours to go and it's my off again...

i dont have any plans to go somewhere later because i hunger for sleep and... ano nga ba? just sleep..dammit...ehehhe...

well physically speaking, i was able to have enough sleep this week because am not stressed nor exhausted, which is a good thing ... maybe because of the slack period here...and it's cool coz you get to rest on between calls and even go to the john without consuming our damn aux codes....i just dunno why i still need to sleep or why i always look forward to do it...

hehehe... wake up sleepy head!

i've been complaining for 3 days now about the ineffable stress that i am feeling and i was able to come up what's the right term for it:

BURNED OUT!

according to encarta dictionary

burned out means

become exhausted: to become or make somebody exhausted or unwell through too much hard work, stress, or reckless living

and it is like i'm doomed to be exhausted forever...

i really need a GOD DAMN BREAK...

and i'm freakin serious about this...

hmmm...i smell a body pleasure later... BODY SPA that is!

its my restday today ...so i think it would be a great idea to relax...i just hope it'll be worth it...

***sigh***

so un nga...

ang pinaka unang tagalog blog ko...

wala lang... kakasawa kc mag MONGLISH....ska maganda na rin to... para walang nakakaintinding jumericans sa mga blogs ko...ahahaha...

well..malapit na matapos ang araw ko.... 20 minutes na lang at ang  maganda pa noto aux 9 ako ng 5 minutes then outbreak...san ka pa???/

ang saya saya diba???

antok na antok na nga ako eh,,,5 hours lang kc tulog ka...eh kc may nagtxt sken tapos nde na ako nakatulog...bad treeeeePPP!

konti na lang at out nko...bwahahhaha...matutulog talaga ako ng mahimbing mamya...

kaso manonood pala ako ng starting over...damn...im torn between two plans...kainis...

bahala na si batman!!! what comes first...

haaaaayyyy.... stress talaga ang nararamdaman ko this past few months...

gusto ko talaga mag bakasyon ng mahaba....as in bakasyong hunyango..yung tipong matutulog ka lang tapos gigising ka lang then kakain then shopping to the max then gimik kung saan...

wish ko lang talaga... tangna...sana maging milyonaryo ako...

bwahahaha...

haaaayyy..... ulet...

2 minutes na lang.....yahooooo...

oh sha...tapusin ko na to...

babush....

it's my restday today but i'm here at the office because of our MANDATORY FGD...

*********************************************

MANDATORY - usually because of being officially required

*********************************************

i think that explains everything why am here...

anyway,my day started when i came home at around 0830am, after changing clothes, i automatically turned on the tv then look for some sensible shows...unfortunately, i ended up watching BOTE DYARYO GARAPA - title of the movie from cinema one..it was a funny movie though...

i just hate how it was created... old styles and punchlines... bumenta na kasi sa akin yung mga yun...

the last thing that i remember is the finale of the movie..of course just like other filipino comedy movies...a happy ending...then i fell asleep while watching...<damn...i forgot to brush my teeth...> after 4 short hours, at around 0100 pm... a phone call from an old friend halted my peaceful sleep...she's inviting me for a snack...so we met at Shangri-La mall and ate some burger and fish fillet from Wendys..you know what's funny about it? coz we can't stop reminiscing all our foolish notions back in college..once we start talkin...man, it's all about our kalokohan...

i missed those old days..

i missed everything....notebooks, professors, organizations, assignment, extra curricular activities, field trips, girl talk, cutting classes, COE day, gossips, boarding house hopping, sex stories while doing an overnight termpaper, gate crashing, boys, fling, mutual understanding...it really makes me smile.... i just missed everything about it...

it rekindles certain feeling inside me...

i just hope i could go back... to experience everything again...to be with my buddies and spend sleepless nights drinking POMELO GIN...

cant believe that it's been 2 years since our graduation... everybody's been busy with their chosen path... but i know that deep in our hearts and minds....everyone will always be a part of each other lives...
wished to bump them one of these days...

can't wait for a GET-2-GEDER thang...wooohooo!

just had a normal day.. or should i say a boring day..

well...everyday is a TEDIOUS day here in my work station...

if not only for the payday, which is 2 days from now, and my TM's encouragement..i would'nt be here...damn 'thank you for calling'... damn irate customers...damn 'is there anything else? <which makes my ATT tragic>' ...damn 'have a nice day'... damn the stress that grows rapidly all over my body whenever im talking to stupid callers... damn stupid callers...and damn because i cannot released those calls because of this lil angel inside me...<believe or not...i still have that angel...>

i'm just thinking if i would be able to move forward from here...i dont wanna be an L1 anymore....i need growth...

i just realized that i have a lot of plans that i need to prioritize coz i'm not getting any younger..

i should've start saving money for my future and establish my own career which i know would be a lifetime commitment for me..

but the big question is where should i start? should i resign? should i look for another call center job? should i start establishing my business? or should i go abroad and work there?

i dunno... i'm not able to think intelligently....in other words..confused!

it's like that the 2 sides of my brain are grappling with what to be the next right step to do...something that will going to make sense...you know what i mean...

it's indeed hard but i know eventually, everything will be set into order

i promise not to be a LOSER in the end... and i wont!

*sigh* missed making my blogs everyday..

sorry...i dont have enough time to do it...

and it's because of 'STARTING OVER' <a show from ETC>

ano magagawa ko? eh ang ganda nya eh....

but i'l try my best to update this everyday...

alwight... will be back later...

i've been spending my day reading blogs from different people who are closely related to BOKO...

until now, i'm still thinking what really happened last January 1st...

it's hard to explain coz we're not allowed to elaborate it..or to be blunt about it especially in this type of expression..

but anyway, BOKO, my colleague died last january 1st because of a gun shot...

i don't really knew him personally, in fact i dont even recall a single moment that I saw him in flesh.. alive...but his story somehow affects me...

and as how i understand, there are things that are left undone but i still believe that wherever he's now, i know that he's happy though there are some unfinished business..

i just hope that the gun man will surrender...

it should'nt have happened but it did...

that only proves that we do not have any control in our lives..we should always be thankful that we always have the chance to enjoy new things...face new challenges....encounter new people... and correct wrong deeds with a good one..

this may not be the last...but it's never too late...

so for you BOKO... rest in peace..

it was another typical day! nothing extraordinary happen

just took 22 calls then lunch time 75 minutes before my logged out time...asking for the remaining 15 minutes? for my last 15 minute break...hehehe...talk about being wise....

its my restday today and am planning to have my hair cut later <AGAIN???>  well it's starting to look hideous and homely... so i better cut it now.. knowing me...i always have time for my hair..

as far as i can remember i woke up late yesterday evening..i was supposed to be awake at 630 but because of my all-of-a-sudden laziness..i decided again to lie down and find myself rushing when i woke up at 740 pm...

so i had a spur-of-the-moment bath...it sucks.. i was'nt able to do my usual ritual...

anyways, so i came here at about 950 pm...not bad for a little-sluggard-woman like me...

talagang may little pa no??

talked to my not-so-irate but not-so-nice customers.... well...let's just forget about it!

i've been dealing with them for the past 8 hours... gimme a damn break...

but anyhow,time for me to leave....hehhe... my favorite part of the week.... RESTDAY!

just saw this poem from my BAUL...

just wanna share it... i just find it so mushy!

10 Things I Hate About You

I hate the way you talk to me,
and the way you cut your hair;
I hate the way you drive my car,
I hate it when you stare.

I hate your big dumb combat boots,
And the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick;
It even makes me rhyme.

I hate the way you're always right,
I hate it when you lie,
I hate it when you make me laugh;
Even worse when you make me cry.

I hate it that you're not around,
And the fact that you didn't call.
But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you;
Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.

is there anyone out there who can  explain to me why these people are just like a stupid piece of shit?

damn... they're like.....grrrrr.... TOO STUPID TO BE TRUE

waaaah... please give me a TEKKIE one...i need a break!

and damn again...just because my PC was ghost by  IT... i can no longer upload photos....waaaaaaah AGAIN!

nice start for a new year.....im OUTTA here...

got 24 calls and i'm still in auto in mode...

am just fed up talking and troubleshooting damn ' i-cannot-connect-to-the-internet' issue...or problem for this matter..

my nape is aching...felt so wasted...too much stressed and its like my blood in my body will gonna burst any minute now..

i'm just really strained and drained... no more energy left

and in times like this, i'm really glad that my teammates are here....exchanging TSISMIS while taking calls... 'mute mode' that's what they say... don't care if it's dead air...

'dead air na kung dead air'

tired of building rapport...they are not my friends after all...bweheheh

sometimes i can't help to be bawdy while talking to them...well..you know me

being RIBALD is ME...what can i do? it is really ME, i don't care what people freakin say...

i can't please everybody... whether they LIKE it or NOT... that's ME and that's how i express my personality..

and besides, as far as i know...people that surrounds me love me for what I am... so it doesnt really bother me at all...


anyways, one more sleep then its new year...

time to think what will be my new year resolution..

NEW YEAR RESOLUTION???? uso pa ba yun??

i know that this year is not a good year for everyone...

of all the calamities and disasters....a lot of people died and the worst part is the 'TSUNAMI' happened last Saturday... you can never tell really what will happen next...

well, it just made me realized how blessed i am for the past year....

THANK GOD!!!

oh well, time for me to log out... hope that i'll have a good sleep

eheheh..

nice 15 minute break huh.. i was caught by my Team Manager taking a nap during my 15-minute break...and the worst thing is, I exceeded the allotted 15 minutes...but anyhow, it's just only a minute..my TM and I just laugh about it... he's really the best... one of the best team manager i had (well...i just only had 2 TM's...1 from Client Logic <dell account>, which is also suuuuper cool and the latter , Herman Dy , my current Tm> both of them really awes me...

herman dy is a full blooded chinese but a true filipno with his words...that's what makes him stand out from other chinese... eheheh

anyways, that 15-minute nap really helped me a lot to be more alive now...<at least>

my call is getting on my nerves again and i just want to wrap this in a jiffy.... bwehehehe..

had to  'BATAS' now my customer huh...what dya think???

***lunch time***

it's almost 4:05 am and it feels like i will gonna explode... would you imagine how do i look when i'm taking calls while sleeping??? man..just forget about it..

it really sucks to troubleshoot our damn emerging issue.... well, i dont wanna talk about it...

but anyhow, 3 hours to go then logged out again...

new year is slowly approaching.. the next thing you know, it's another year had passed again..

365 days have been consumed and we are about to face new challenges for this year to come..

i just despise the fact that  i'll be one year older again next year...

waaahhhh... i dont wanna get older... just kiddin...

so much for that...

logged out..release... logged out release..logged out ...release

24th of December

18 hours more to go and its CHRISTMAS time...

'tis the season to be jolly...tra lala lala lala la la...'

im pretty much excited... the good thing is, it's my off today...

i tnink this will be my most splendid christmas... i was able to get some gifts from my loved ones...most of them gave me things that i really prayed for<well... i used the term 'gave' because i got them already... man, i can't wait to open it the remaining ones...> such as the lacoste pink perfume then a necklace from ben affleck hottie, a shopping spree budget from my mom, a purple stuff toy from a colleague ( i got it from our exchange gift), a violet cutie watch from my sister <it's not really expensive but it's really really cool> and i think i will be getting a violet or purple curtain for my room from my auntie...

but i still have a good vibes that i will be getting a lot more... <think positive nikole..think positive> so i'm really really having a blast...anyway, 11 minutes more and then log out again...

so MERRY CHRISTMAS to everybody....kisses from me... XXX

yahooooooooooooooo!!!!

group discussion again

i hope it wouild last until 7am..

don't want to take calls anymore..

so toxic... my last call lasted for almost 100 minutes... that's 1 hour and 40 minutes...

damn...

i just wished i could go out of town... thailand or china...and go shopping whenever or whatever i want it to be..

then travel to europe especially to PARIS...haaaaayyyyy!

it's my greatest dream...to go to PARIS...

anyway, reality check... we're almost done... after  20 minutes, officially logged out for this day...then take calls again later...

over and over again....nothing new...i'm starting to get bored...

it sucks...

nikole signing off.... 

we had a so called 'awarding ceremony' a while ago just before we start our shift...but it's only within our team... 'team germs'...it all went well!!!

and i got 3 awards: bwehehhe

1. team attendance award - perfect attendance fof the month of november

2. very satisfied survey award - which means that i satisfied at least one customer for the month of november ( nice award for an irate agent like me...huh!?!)

and last but definitely not the least...is

3. the agent of the month award - i got the highest average for the month of november among us...

cool isn't it??? yeaaahhh...

also, we got 2 bar of delicious and yummy brownies from our AM (Account Manager) which serves as his christmas gifts to all of his agents...

as of the moment, i've been struggling to maintain my patience while talking to my 'i-dont-know-what-the-heck-is-happening-to-my-customers '

i dunno if its my luck, but mosf of them are irate... my conclusion is

irate customer = irate agent

simple as that...

just go with the flow man... hehehhee...

finally....

i've been waiting for so long for this day... i mean i could've done a lot of things for myself but i dont have enough time because i need to go here.. to take calls..

and unfortunately, i'm slowly loosing my voice... crap...

after 7 long freakin stressful damn days... it's my restday again..yeah it is...

however, i still need to attend our FGD..(FGD - Focus Group Discussion)

just to have some fun..it's a dinner group date of our team... so basically, i'm expecting that everybody's there to get nasty...bweheheh...just kiddin..

actually, im a lil bit excited because this will be the first time that our team will have this get together thing outside 25th floor na kumpleto kame...

we had one before but not everyone's present...

so ... it's like everyone's there drinking and laughing...no CALLS..no IRATE CUSTOMERS... no TOGGLING... no METRICS... no HASSLES... no STRESS to lower down the ATT.. no PAMBABATAS.... ahahha...

just merely having fun...

well, exchanging of gifts is also what i'm looking forward to...

i hope i will be able to get the stuff that i want...

wanna know what it is????

any PURPLE STUFF... hehhehe...

ohryt... one minute to go for auto in...

4 hours left then RESTDAY THAT IS!

yahooooo....